The Top Ten Films of 2011 Most Likely to Make You Hurl

Top Ten Best of Lists abound at the end of the year, and never let it be said that flicksthatmakemesick is above following the major critics like a bleating sheep. Their lists discuss the best movies that were shown, usually including an Iranian classic or two that no one else saw that makes them feel very important. But flicksthatmakemesick speaks for the people! We are not analyzing the dinosaur metaphor that clearly indicated something really symbolic in Terrance Malik’s The Tree of Life; we are attempting to keep you from throwing up on your new sweater while contemplating Tom Cruise hanging upside down on the outside of the world’s tallest building. (my advice would be do not attempt Mission Impossible on a date night. Especially in IMAX. Just sayin’.) Continue reading

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The Descendants

People tend to jump to conclusions about certain destinations. If I say Paris, your imagination has you heading straight to the top of the Eiffel Tower, possibly while holding a baguette. Mention New York City, and you immediately think Broadway and the fact that there is no way you are getting a ticket to The Book of Mormon for at least six more months. Plan a weekend in Minneapolis and you’re either going to the Mall of America or to hang out with Garrison Keillor. Not sure which one of those is worse. Continue reading

Breaking Dawn

Y’all know I love you, right? Keeping my devoted readers happy is my number one goal. Why, next to my kids, my family, my cats, and about twelve other things I can’t remember at the moment, you guys are the most important people in the whole world to me. Watching those clicks turn over in the Blog Stats counter is addictive – like a monkey on crack, I just want more more MORE! And I’d do just about anything to get your attention. But as a certain Mr. Loaf once astutely sang, “I would do anything for love (but I won’t do that).” Continue reading

The Muppet Movie

Anyone who follows pop culture is sure to have noticed the surge of puppet sex in the last several years. Avenue Q (2002) started it on Broadway, when the loveable Muppet-like characters began getting it on in a way that was vaguely unsettling, considering that they were blue and fuzzy. In 2004, Team America (Fuck Yeah!) took it to a whole new level. Trey Parker and Matt Stone had to fight to keep their little movie from being tagged with an NC17 rating because of the variety of positions the dolls assumed. They succeeded, but left in just enough marionette fornication to forever change the way you look at the racks of Barbie dolls at Target. In last year’s The Beaver, Mel Gibson wanted to do it with Jodie Foster while the beaver puppet participated, opening up the plot line to a whole new array of punch lines. Continue reading